R.I.P John Hurt

Time doesn't stop just because it's a new year. I needed to have tried harder in 2016 to keep up but on some level I've been holding my breath and waiting for it to end. It's not going to.

Someday cancer and I are going to have words.

Storyteller, Doctor, doomed Spaceman, Wand Seller, paranormal Professor Broom, Horned King. And everything else. What an IMDB page, this guy. Caligula AND Jesus?

My favourites among Mr. Hurt's roles in my preferred fantasy genres have brilliance and greatness mingled with great suffering and tragedy. This is a loss keenly felt, and it's his role on Doctor Who that asked us to take hold of The Moment.

R.I.P Joe Alaskey

I'm too old now to pretend that 63 is a good, long life. It's clearly too short a span for a splendid vocal performer who hand-delivered me a lotta yuks in times of gloom. The prolific successor to Mel Blanc of blessed memory, Joe Alaskey was probably from space, or he wouldn't have been so believably bad as nerdy would-be world-conquering Martians like Marvin & Dr. Ziplock. Mr. Alaskey taught me to love the sound (but never the taste!) of "Corrugated Bran Puffs" as Grampa Pickles from Rugrats. Plus, not for nothing, he's got my vote for immortality as the unlikeable yet unkillable Duck Dodgers. Joe Alaskey- a talent to remember beyond the 24th & a Half Century.

R.I.P. Alan Rickman

Because the universe is not always fair, cancer continues to destroy Englishmen I admire. 

Doctor Lazarus, Metatron, Marvin the Paranoid Android, & Severus Snape will always be deeply memorable and valuable to me and many millions of you.

I don't have the right words of my own for my sadness lately, and now I don't have the Voice of God to speak the snark for me, either. I fear that being older means losing all my heroes. And I'm forced to remind myself that nothing and no energy and no one loved is ever truly lost.

By Grabthar's hammer, by the suns of Warvan, you shall be avenged!

R.I.P. David Bowie

I can't claim special knowledge of The Man Who Fell To Earth, but I am bummed out that he's fallen off it again.

Thanks to Guardians of the Galaxy, I've listened to 'Moonage Daydream' a lot lately. I'm full of doing my own thing and I didn't even know David Bowie was sick, so it goes to show you can snap your fingers and turn around... and lose something important in a moment. It's only forever- not long at all.

My wife rightly suggested we revisit 'Labyrinth' tonight, and it remains a wonder and a delight. Sing sadly tonight for a troubador, performer, space oddity, and Goblin King.

R.I.P. Christopher Lee

This week Death died, you guys.

So... I don't have to tell you that Christopher Lee was a top drawer actor with a MASSIVE career and achievements. If you've seen any horror movies from... well, EVER, then you know this dude.

Draculas, Mummys, evil Germans, evil Asians, evil Englishmen, evil doctors, evil wizards, guys with crystal balls, guys with lightsabers, guys with golden guns, princes of darkness, and LITERALLY the grim spectre of Death. He's ACTUALLY narrated my nightmares!

Because I am who I am, I enjoyed my first exposure to Mr. Lee as Dr. Catheter in Gremlins 2. I've also really enjoyed every subsequent exposure to this towering genius, with a vast history of films I've never even attempted.

Celebrate the shadow. Celebrate the life. Rest in Peace, Mr. Lee... and live everlasting.

TV Review: Battlestar Galactica

I can be like a daggit with a Borellian bone once I get an idea in my head, so I recently finished re-watching the entire GOL-MONGING saga of Battlestar Galactica! As my pal Kirk asked: "For punishment?" 

Was it all worth it? You decide! (No, strike that. I'll decide.)

Of course, I watched it the way the One True God intended: Chronologically by Content! 

First- the Remake's Prequel Series! "Caprica", or as it is more popularly known- "Patton Oswalt Explains It All", takes us far way and long ago to a decadent planet where everything is edgy except the sheets of paper. (Because all the corners are cut off. Actually... they have MORE edges. I might be getting off topic...) Everyone's out for number one as an evil robot army congeals inexorably out of the quest for immortality during a clash of political, religious, and racial ideologies. Plus it has Eric Stoltz!

Fav. Ep.: "Apotheosis"- Cylon heroes fight for the forces of decency and corporate profit vs monotheist terrorists in a crowded sports stadium! There may be some explosions involved.

Least Fav. Ep.: "Retribution"- Intrigue becomes intriguing as machinations turn wheels within wheels and schemes near the point of no return while the thick, simmering plot begins to... *snore*

Next, I watched Battlestar Galactica (2004) AKA "Battleglum Galacticglum". It's as glum as the Black Hole of Hades but on stunning blu-ray it turns out it's also one of the finest TV dramas of my lifetime. There, I admit it.

Fav. Ep.: "Battlestar Galactica: The Plan" Again, the Cylons are the heroes! Yes, he may stab little children, but he's Dean Stockwell, so it's all good!

Least Fav. Ep.: "Black Market" If it wasn't bad enough that Re-imagined Apollo had a dull, human name like Lee Adama, now they've made him a whoring John with a heart of gold. Who battles child sex slavers! Yikes! It may or may not be the darkest tale from a collapsed society trapped in the void of space, but it's pretty dark stuff.

From the troubled ancestors of the Incas, the Toltecs, and the Lemurians we proceed to the star-brothers of contemporary man: on a 30 year star voyage beginning sometime after 1969, culminating in 1980, and full of too many other inconsistencies to believe for a single micron!

Battlestar Galactica (1978) is a ridiculous, archaic piece of misogynist quasi-Mormon laser disco. Dirk "Face-Man" Benedict and Lorne "Bonanza" Greene light up the small screen, sharing equal billing with some poor chimp stuffed inside a Muppet. Kids will scratch their heads with delight unless they were born in the late seventies. In which case they already spent hundreds of centons watching and loving it like an Ovion grub loves an overfed gambler who's stumbled drunkenly into its honeycomb!

Fav. Ep.: "Saga of A Star World" This is where it all began! Well, "Star Wars" is where it all began, but this is also available! 

Least Fav. Ep. Tie: "The Lost Warrior" & "The Young Lords". Which is worse: space cowboys in tinfoil Stetsons versus a tribe of horny pig-men, or seven to twelve 7 to 12 year olds in ratty Viking costumes riding unicorns against the most flamboyant candy-cane that ever called itself a Cylon?

Yeah, the cutesy robots are purest felgercarb. Granted, my beloved Muffit 2 gets a pass, but the goofy awkward "dancing" Hector & Vector were MUCH worse. Just picture the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz re-imagined as a pair of pasty dildos in overalls. Just awful. 

Honourable mention: "Experiment in Terra" for having all the conceptual ingredients for "Quantum Leap". It's not as good by half as any episode of Quantum Leap, but the seed is there.

Galactica 1980 AKA "Space Invaders Meet Wolfman Jack". This is where the punishment really begins, but I'm a completist, gods frack it all. Our rag-tag fugitive fleet has lost all but 2 of its lead characters and replaced them with one angelic teenage boy with magic science powers. You'll believe a motorcycle can fly.

Fav. Ep.: "The Return of Starbuck" It does what it says on the tin, and it's not half bad. Again, the evil Cylon is the good guy. What does this say about me, I wonder?

Least Fav. Ep.: "Spaceball" Precocious super-powered moppets spewing precocious nonsense and playing baseball as if they were from space. Get it?

Series creator Glen A. Larson, made a lot of cool things happen on TV for a lot of years. This was definitely one of my favourites, along with the arguably slightly more successful 'Buck Rogers'. Also, I read that Mr. Larson stole a song from James Garner, so Rockford socked him in the snoot! 

Series re-imagineer Ronald D. Moore used to work on Star Trek. He's good at stuff.

Much praise extended to Netflix, YouTube, and my buddy Ron for the blu-rays that made it all possible. So say we all!

My Favourite Characters: Self-Portable Sapient

What little hacker boy or girl wouldn't want a Banana Junior 6000 for Christmas, 1984?

Oliver Wendell Jones of Bloom County, U.S.A., for example.

Little wonder (considering the havoc caused him by his son's previous computers) that Oliver's father Floyd was reluctant to part with $2500, and indeed may have put it on an overzealous department store Santa's very own VISA!

But there is was! On Xmas morn! The cheery, yellow, walking, talking, 9000 series personal computer from Banana Electronics, Inc.

When not assisting Oliver by engaging in nefarious schemes to bring about the collapse of their own decadent Western civilization, the Banana Jr. could be found contemplating the nature of the electronic mortal soul, or offering lesser appliances in sacrifice to its mercurial god: the Jones family television set.

Both characters were the inventions of Berkeley Breathed, an insane Texan. I guess that's redundant. A Texan, then.

Along with all their huggable, liberal, MERCHANDISABLE pals (like Mr. P. Opus & Bill The Cat), Banana Junior and Oliver have amused me greatly this week in volume after volume. Just as they did when I was a precocious young scamp, save that thanks to Breathed's annotations I now get some of the more esoteric jokes.

I also admire Mr. Breathed for his ongoing efforts to conserve living things, and look forward this year to Disney's adaptation of his adorable kids' book "Mars Needs Moms".

Favourite Kid-Friendly Catch-phrase from the Banana 6000: "Ted Koppel is a Waffle."

My Favourite Characters: Captain Crash

Superheroes tend to have code names. The closest Ralph Hinkley ever got was "Super Guy" or "Captain Gonzo". As you probably know or can recall hearing an old man jabbering about, Ralph was 'The Greatest American Hero' from 1981-1983.  When I was six he was the best. Ralph tried really hard and he crashed into things... a lot! In my early 20s, GAH became synonymous with making rash purchases based on nostalgia. One of my first complete season DVD acquisitions... turned into bitter disappointment. My arrogant opinion back then: the show was bland, only sporadically funny, hellishly repetitive, and inconsequential.

Trying again is what a superhero is all about, so when all it was costing me was time and my sanity... I watched all 44 hour-long episodes on YouTube. And (much like using a powerful alien spacesuit when you've lost the instructions), I CANNOT recommend it. GAH is a phenomenal concept, executed by well-meaning people, and it was NEVER intended to be shotgunned in this way. I got SO bored during season 2 that I tried screening 4 episodes at once on all 4 devices at my disposal- TV, laptop, iPad, and iPhone. Does this count? Was I even following the story at that point? Don't Care! I finally watched it, and I'm never doing it again. Until next time.

With the assistance of mysterious alien voices on the radio, snarling FBI agent Bill, and long, long, LONG suffering girlfriend Pam, Ralph overcomes adversity, often caused by his own inability with his abilities. He breaks his own home, and doors, and friends. His ESP has him wearing women's clothes and reacting to things that aren't there. His invisibility is unreliable and his shrinking is pretty damn unconvincing. He flies as low as he dares and as rarely as he can. He ends up looking silly all the time, and would rather not be caught dead in his own magic jammies. But he can always shrug it off. Ralph's a teacher, and from Ralph I learned something valuable: I will fail. I will look ridiculous. And I will not stop trying even when the payoff is mediocre. Here's to ordinary people who help others- especially if the only cost is your dignity.

RIP Leonard Nimoy

(Illustration credit Paul Hanley)

I never met Leonard Nimoy, but his work had a powerful influence in my life. I am saddened by his passing, and I have to add my small element of gratitude to the outpouring of tributes I'm seeing online. As Star Trek's Mr. Spock, Mr. Nimoy was a touchstone for all nerd culture. In my mind, his voice is the very voice of reason. A passionate heart guided by a disciplined mind. I have no doubt whatsoever that he will be remembered for centuries.

Writer, director, musician, artist, and actor, he was most inspirational. There are depths to the person that I will never know, but the character I loved and will always love.
We outsiders needed Spock, and we loved him. For bringing that eerily alien yet so-familiar human being to us all, especially to me, I am sincerely grateful.

TV Review: LEXX

In terms of SF Comedy where a low-ranking slacker, a re-animated dead guy, a libidinous part-animal creature, and a fussy, broken robot wander a universe devoid of humanity in an empty spaceship 10,000 meters long there is only one work of timeless, extraordinary genius-- Red Dwarf.

Also, starting in 1997, LEXX was on!

Brought to you by two countries that know a little something about side-splitting humour and atrocity, Germany and my own native land, Canada, created a hot little mess of program I never hear anybody talking about.
And I watched all four seasons just for YOU! Well, you and boobs. Yes, there are a couple of boobs, plus some bums also.

The series fits no single category I know: Grand Guignol? Erotic Satire? Dystopian Musical? Sociopath Date Movie? It features the epic, 4000 year quest of repugnant, self-serving Security Guard Class 4 Stanley H. Tweedle to find meals and sex while trying not to be eaten or screwed over. Through no effort of his own, Stan is thrown together with Xev Bellringer (a truculent women raised in a "Wife Bank" and accidentally given the powers of a voracious giant lizard), Kai (last of a noble race who defied the unspeakable oligarchy of His Divine Shadow and was punished with eternal servitude as an unstoppable zombie assassin), and (last and least) 790, a severed head with an all-enveloping snark and an all-consuming passion. Speaking of "all-consuming", these troubled... people, I suppose, live inside the stolen command ship of His Divine Shadow, a giant, living, not-too-bright space dragonfly that is always very hungry and loves to destroy a lot of planets.

To sum up, Season 1 is 3 great movies and a 4th so-so movie that throws the crew together, defines their messed-up, so-called "Light Universe", and pits evil against... somewhat less evil. Season 2 is too long and repetitive to be endured in the now-popular "binge watching" approach but basically features the inverse of the Star Trek away team "seeking out new lays in new civilizations where the girls and boys are not too picky or hung up on physical attractiveness or strength of character" every single planet of which ends up obliterated by a self-replicating, galaxy-sized swarm of worker drone arms. Season 3 picks up as LEXX explores the flawed workings and horrible secrets of twin planets Fire and Water. Season 4 finds them in the Darkest depths of the Dark Zone, orbiting the barren single moon of a primitive little Type 13 planet months away from self-destruction by the combined efforts of goths, fairies, geeks, a vampire, a mummy, a demon, several corrupt government agencies, reality TV, Newfoundland, and an asteroid crammed full of scuttling cyborg carrots hell-bent on jumping up everyone's butts. For good or for ill, there has never been another show like this.

Maybe LEXX is the weird inbred cousin the sci-fi family never talks about, and maybe I wouldn't revisit it very often, but in my current mood it hit a certain nostalgic "Who-Gives-A-Shit" button for me. And even though I really, REALLY shouldn't... I liked it.

The moral of the story, if LEXX can be said to have anything resembling a moral, is this: you may think your life sucks-- but (just like most people, things and people-things) life could always suck harder.

Jupiter Ascending

Life being what it is, there are plenty of folks in dire circumstances. My own situation has been (as someone from China apparently said) "Interesting Times" lately. So you may take what I say with all the grains of salt on the moon of Io.

But Jupiter Ascending is a kick-ass romantic adventure and it's totally worth your time!

Whether it's worth your cash depends on your high level of tolerance for gorgeous, possibly extraneous amounts of lasers, space opera cliche, and handsome people saying ridiculous things betwixt explosions.

It's about Russian-Chicagoan janitor Jupiter Jones who discovers she is royal genetic heir to the Earth, which planet turns out to be a commodity the One Percent of the Galaxy are eager to begin fracking. Also Channing Tatum comes to her rescue a lot as Timber Wolf from the Legion of Super-Heroes with his handy-dandy rocket boots.

The poster says "Last Starfighter", Michael "Speed Racer" Giacchino's bombastic music says "Star Trek 2009", and the universe of partly Animal-Men (including D&D-style dragon men in leather jackets) says "Flash Gordon". It's not ground-breakingly feminist although it does pass the Bechdel test (I mean, seriously, Jupiter has to be rescued at the last minute from a loveless space marriage, but she does physically save her own space bacon more than I could). This popcorn flick is no "Guardians of the Galaxy", but it's a darn sight more fun than "Man of Steel" or "John Carter". And speaking of popcorn flicks, dire circumstances, and interstellar greed- $15 is officially nutballs for a salty corn bag and soda.

TV Review: Star Wars Rebels

Because I am secretly 12 years old in a 38-year-old body, I watch an inappropriate amount of the Disney XD channel. The Phineas and Ferb Star Wars Crossover got me hooked on that delightful little formulaic gem, while in recent days I've enjoyed a cartoon that needs none of my hype: Star Wars Rebels.

Think of SW:R as a dumbed-down Firefly for kids, but then again there are lots of times I hate using my vaunted brain and just want brightly coloured people and toys to run in circles and explode.

Plus I think executive producer Dave Filoni and Co. could do a lot worse than the highly creative Ralph McQuarrie art design for the setting: 5-years before Star Wars: A New Hope. Did I ever mention that I'm fond of Star Wars?

The tramp freighter Ghost is mobile home to a small assortment of brightly coloured space wizards who "redistribute" weapons and adorable Wookie slaves in opposition to the oppressive laws of the Evil Galactic Empire. Please do not pirate the DVDs.

My favourite episode of those aired so far was "Droids in Distress" by Greg "Snapper Carr" Weisman, producer and former writer on Kim Possible. It had some of everything: humour, lasers, great voice cast, appealing animation, Anthony "Never Not C-3PO" Daniels, and the robot bus driver from my favourite Disney attraction; Star Tours.

Anyway, since you're not already over-saturated with TV, you might like it. If you're twelve. Or slightly older.

Comic Review: Bitch Planet issue #1

Am I woman enough for Bitch Planet?

Well, I DO love sci-fi, Kelly Sue (Captain Marvel) DeConnick, and big naked ladies. So... Issue #1... Win!

What's it all about? An abusive patriarchy on Earth is exiling females to an
exo planet for "Non Compliance". Kind of "Orange is the New Black Hole".
Also, this is a reality show, maybe? Anyway, it's a heckuvan intriguing start.

If it's not clear from the incendiary title, this Image Comic is for mature readers, but they let ME have one for Three-Fiddy anyway! Valentine De Landro's art is stark and striking for a grim-looking future setting.

It's a weird sort of exodus, these outcast gals into the big black. Radicals and killers, volunteers (!?!) and, from context, very likely enthusiastic clerical errors. Who put this madness together... and why? "Caged and Enraged!" blares the cover. Is it all about grindhouse and the male gaze, or is it possible one might be better off getting light years away from the Planet of the Dicks?

Penny Rolle and Kamai Kogo are exciting protagonists, there is much mystery in the set-up, and one of the douchebag dudes pulling the strings is named Schiti. Tee hee! Can't wait to see what's brewing next month. A crossover title for the feminist and the discount old pervert alike. Make mine bitchy!

TV Review: Roughnecks Starship Troopers Chronicles

Ask not what your late '90's CGI military SF series can do for YOU...

Engaged in the obsessive goal of reading and watching everything Robert Heinlein spawned (even peripherally), I was excited to find "Roughnecks Starship Troopers Chronicles" on DVD at the used bookstore Wee Book Inn. And I finally finished watching it today, only 15 years late to the battlefront. One season with a gluttonous 36 episodes- not counting a whopping FOUR clip shows. Sweet Christmas, talk about overkill!

Entrenched in day 43 of the Interstellar Bug War, the space marines of SICON have seized and maintained a firm hold on Uncanny Valley. Seen here is psi-talented trooper Carl Jenkins, overcome with childlike glee...

Oh, my mistake, that's a Cybernetic Humanoid Assault System, or CHAS. This robot character was featured in the best episode of the series- "Of Flesh and Steel", making the ultimate sacrifice for the salvation of all Non-Bug-Kind...

No, sorry, right the first time. THIS is CHAS. That dead-eyed hobgoblin up there was Carl, all right.

Stiff, wooden, creatures from hell (and their foes, the bugs of Klendathu) battle across simulated ice, "water", jungle, and desert with all the sex and violence available to the impressionable North American youth of 1999 at 6 AM on a Saturday.

But, to its credit, this series is actually the first Starship Troopers product to fulfill my twisted desire for chronological completeness by finally mentioning that (in this flat little dimension at least) Rico and chums signed up to stomp arachnids in 2078. If only this trivia made the series better. O.K., so the campaigns have their moments... usually taken word-for-word from the first movie.

Wee Book will get this one back... if they are unwary enough to take it! Final Score from best to worst: ST the movie, ST: Invasion, ST the book, ST3, ST2, and, in fairness, I haven't found the eighties era anime adaptation yet, but it CAN'T possibly be worse than ST2.

The best I can say is that all the folks behind this forgettable, humourless toon were probably killing themselves making so much with so little. "Reboot" had it beat all hollow, but for someone with helmet-mounted nostalgia goggles on, it's probably fine... in teeny, tiny, firefry-sized doses.

Book Review: The Callahan Chronicals

Based on how often I post here, you'd think I had stopped reading and taken up some other hobby... such as drinking to excess. Incorrect!

The Thanksgiving season makes me thankful for the love of my life and the finest friends I could ask for. Without them I'd surely turn to boozy self-medication, which I'd otherwise regard as a deeply mistaken approach to problem solving.

Spider Robinson presents a sci-fi version of the place where everybody knows your name. Even if your name is Txffu Mpwfs, the world-destroying cyborg from the short story "The Guy With The Eyes". This weekend I finished the short-story collection of Mr. Robinson's: 'The Callahan Chronicals'. (I love the wrap-around cover! (Shown Here) It turns out there are only 6 characters I can't name on it. Five if the cat reaching for the cash is Pixel from Heinlein's 'The Cat Who Walks Through Walls'.)

Mr. Robinson is previously known to me peripherally as the guy who co-wrote 'Variable Star' with Robert Heinlein's ghost. Long-time readers of my blog will know that book very nearly topped the list of my favourite books of the noughties. My manager Chris gets a great big thank-you for loaning me some of Mr. Robinson's earliest books and magazines (including early printings of the Hugo winning Telempath and Stardancer stories). But Spider Robinson is arguably most famous for Callahan's Place, which spawned great fan love online as the Interwebs were first being spun, and that love continues today. The Place is the kindest, most psychologically sympathetic bar you've ever heard of. At Callahan's the wretched and the weird discover 'shared pain is lessened, shared joy is increased'. I appreciate the bad jokes and the good intentions. This is some darn fine writing. I'm looking forward to continuing the series.

Oh, and if you have just under 4 minutes, here's Author/Music Man Spider Robinson performing his own The Drunkard's Song.

Book Review: STAR WARS A New Dawn

So! The Disney Corporation swallowed the Star Wars and Marvel film franchises whole- and all I got was this Darth Vader digital watch. But what else can I do? NOT watch all the stuff I like? There's every probability that the good folks at Disney can throw money and talent at things until they're good again. (Speaking of which, I don't remember why I didn't like Disney in the first place- ever seen 'Phineas and Ferb'? It's pretty great.)

Where was I? Yes. I had a great time watching 'Star Wars: The Clone Wars' and I have every expectation that I'll enjoy 'Star Wars: Rebels' this October. To that end, I borrowed 'Star Wars: A New Dawn' as a preview. This novel features an Evil Empire getting a foothold and beginning to seriously creep people out (about 8 years after Palpatine took the reins and everybody seemed o.k. with it- except for all those Jedi jerks he shot in the back to preserve the peace).

Hera Syndulla is a clever woman with a plan to put things right, and Kanan Jarrus is a tough guy who would rather nobody noticed him (just in case tough guys raised in religions starting with "J" are still being singled out as rancor chow). With the aid of a disgruntled Imperial snoop called Zaluna (a Sullustan who's easily my favourite character here), they team up with a paranoid explosives expert to break Murdock out of the asylum again and stop the crazy murdering middle-management cyborg Vidian before he shatters a moon in the name of efficiency.

Much praise to author John Jackson Miller. To be completely candid, I enjoyed Miller's 'Kenobi' more but the difference between 5 stars and 4 stars is only the difference between 'awesome' and 'really good'.

Also I see on his website that Mr. Miller wrote a Star Trek book, I should really check that out sometime, too.

Book Review: DOCTOR WHO Engines of War

Aww, yeah! I've been looking forward to a novel about the Last Great Time War since I first heard of it in 2005. What's the Last Great Time War, you ask? This probably isn't the blog for you! But, in a nutshell, it's the fictional many-fronted final genocidal planet-cracking time-warping battle to extinction between the mighty Time Lords and the hate-spewing Daleks.

Now with John Hurt!

I pre-ordered this book the very minute I saw the cover back in July. It arrived Monday. And I finished it just now. It takes place "4 centuries" into the Time War, one century into the unofficial ninth life of the Time Lord "renegade" formerly known as The Doctor, and shortly before the TV episode "The Day of The Doctor".

It's the story of Cinder, a girl from planet Moldox, a beautiful world fallen long since beneath the hovering heels of the cyborg Daleks. And it's the story of the choices of the crusty old alien Cinder teams up with to prevent the alternative reality mutants known as Skaro Degradations from their latest scheme to erase all other forms of life. With his own people willing to go to appalling lengths to end the war, our hero has no moral high ground and only his feelings to guide him. Especially his crustiness.

Author George Mann has a real ear for the dialogue of Doctor Who, and a ripping good action yarn it turned out to be. No complaints from me- this is a story with a cannon made out of moons!

So read it already!

Tales of Trenzalore

Despite the cool cast and premise I don't have it in me to pay much further attention to SyFy's "Battledogs", so instead you get a semi-spoilery book review of "Tales of Trenzalore: The Eleventh Doctor's Last Stand". Aren't you lucky?

I'm actually MOST excited about the "Eighth" Season of Doctor Who which premiered two days ago... but you may not have seen it yet. Thus... this.

It's four short stories about the town called Christmas on the planet Trenzalore: a low-tech land of perpetual snow and darkness with pleasant inhabitants. (Not unlike Canada, really.) Trenzalore has been under siege for nine centuries, yet remains steadfastly defended from alien invaders by an alien invader called the Doctor.

Each anecdote is worthwhile, quick jaunts in the impossible life of the 1500-year-old Time Lord forced by conscience and circumstance to defend everyone with his wits. In these specific cases, defending them with the added hobbling of a wooden leg, encroaching bodily decrepitude, and a Truth Field that demands total honesty.

Justin Richard's 'Let it Snow' provides a heart-warming story of frozen Martians and avalanche. 'The Dreaming' by Mark Morris offers the mental menace of the Mara. Paul Finch brings an explosive tale of tundra and plastic bullies in 'Strangers in The Outland'. My favourite was 'An Apple A Day' by George Mann. It features the carnivorous avocado known as the Krynoid, whose origin story 'The Seeds of Doom' from 1976 was, for me, most memorably horrifying.

Second item of good news for me: George Mann is the author of 'Engines of War', a Doctor Who novel I ordered a month ago sight unseen. I'm pretty much bound to love it!

38th Birthday- All The Present I Need

Life is so full of hurry and hustle 
Sometimes I think it's passing us by 
The days are like hours, hours like minutes 
I'm caught up in it till I look in your eyes 
And to my surprise I find there is a heaven 
Timeless and real, making me feel 
Free and alive 

You touch me, you kiss me, and time has no meaning 
I'm on a rocket to some other zone 
Baby, you thrill me - whatever you're doing 
Don't think of stopping until we are light-years away 
All alone, cause I want to keep this 
Treasure for my very own 
Your talent for love 

Lyrics by Lorraine Feather (?)

R.I.P. Robin Williams

Alien, madman, genie, father, robot, drunken sailor, clown, human wreckage, king of the moon.

When my wife told me last night that we lost Robin Williams, the news felt like a quick punch in the chest.

He's been in our entertainment lives since we first became mesmerized by dancing colours on screens. He was the soul of my 52nd & 89th favourite movies (Disney's Aladdin & Bicentennial Man). As a dramatic actor, he showed me about being human. As a comic, he taught us that everything was mockable- "Humour. Ark! Ark! What a concept."

We're going to miss him, and this is going to hurt for a while. Shazbot.